By: Latoya Hammond
Hey sis! Have you ever felt lost after experiencing rejection? Have you felt like the person or persons that rejected you somehow took who you were with them when they left or decided for whatever reason you were not what they wanted, you were not the one. If you can relate, then Girl, I GOTT U.
If you have been following my blog over the past year (and if not I'm going to need you to go ahead subscribe mmmmkay??) then you know that over this last year I've been going through a separation from my husband and now in the divorce process. I will be honest with you at the time he came to me expressing his feelings for wanting to separate, it was a time when I was really beginning to step fully into my purpose (or so I thought). I just launched my blog, was building my Instagram page for my blog and working on building my brand and starting a few other projects. Ya girl had goals and dreams. I was focused. In my mind everything was going well. Things felt like they were finally coming together for me. Work was good, kids were good, and even though there were some issues in my marriage (what marriage doesn’t have them) I truly believed everything was and would be all right. Then, life rolled up on me and straight gut punched me! It seemed in the blink of an eye my world was falling apart right in front of me. In the weeks after and months to follow after my separation I recognized I was no longer the woman I felt I had become in the months prior. I had lost the drive, the confidence, focus I once had to work on my goals and dreams. I was in a place of uncertainty, confusion, emotional chaos (COVID, quarantine, virtual learning, work from home, and a separation). My thought was who am I now? What do I do now? It felt like I was starting over. The woman I was at the beginning of 2021 had disappeared in just a few months. I began to feel like I no longer knew what my purpose was and I didn’t know why? And then it dawned on me, REJECTION, it was the rejection I was experiencing that was starting to define who I was and this idea that somehow my purpose was now packed up in my husband's U-Haul. Sounds crazy right? But I would bet that I am not the only one that has felt this way. Here’s the thing, I still had the desire to blog and work on my goals but I was beginning to call my confidence, self worth and purpose into question. The same questions I asked myself when my separation happened (Am I good enough; am I enough; thoughts of failure) were now beginning to take over how I felt about myself in every area of my life.
I was tossed into a whole new reality and the first order of business for me was healing.
What I didn’t realize was that the ending was just the beginning. I learned that when we ask God to reveal our purpose to us we better be ready! I knew that a part of my purpose would be empowering, encouraging and inspiring women through my real life stories and experiences. Letting women know that their past doesn’t define them and it didn’t derail their purpose and destiny. What I didn’t know was that one of my real life stories would be my marriage coming to an end. However, what I have realized is my purpose didn’t end when my marriage did, the ending of my marriage revealed another layer and level of my purpose and what God has called me to do.
You see, God formed you and me and set our purpose in motion before we were ever born. He knows the plans and thoughts that he thinks toward us (Jeremiah 29:11). And no one can take that away! The word of God says that he will work everything for our good and God will use it for his glory. The enemy’s main strategy is to steal, kill and destroy and our purpose is at the top of his hit list. He comes after our thoughts and emotions. When we go through life changing events, especially when we experience rejection it can cause us to question our very existence….our purpose.
Ladies, There is good news! You see according to Philippians 1:6 which says
And I am convinced and sure of this very thing that he who began a good work in you will continue until the day Jesus Christ returns, developing that good work and perfecting and bringing it to full completion in you.
To me this says that God is in control!! Not the one who hurt you, left you, talked about you, betrayed you; It is God who placed purpose on the inside of you and began his good work in you. And it is GOD that WILL see it to completion. It doesn’t matter what happened, who left, who said what and this is not to negate the hurt and pain but it does not cancel the purpose on your life and that purpose being fulfilled.
Sis, remember no one can take away what they never gave!!!